Hello. 19, a number before 18, the 8th prime number, how old I was a 3 year ago and number of this update. Strange how we connect significance/ different significance to numbers, anyway tangent aside, let's get on with this update.
These past few weeks have mainly been more of a focus for myself to take it easy currently, as a lot of repercussions from other weeks are coming back it is proving quite difficult to achieve much creatively. This is without mention that I have been quite busy reconnecting with friends I haven't seen in a while, and the journeys between them.
I have also found myself facing quite a bit of a block currently. I'm not sure what has caused this, weather that being burnt out from the mix of no time to recharge social batteries, and the home situation of not being able to hear myself think let alone create anything of meaning. This in itself I have found I give myself way too much pressure on creating and curating, causing kind of a bit of a loop of stress from not making and too stressed to make. Through this week and last I decided to just try and keep it all on a level until things calm down a little more. Hence why I have watched a lot of films these past few days, you'll see my review them later on.
I've wanting to get into in-person DND as well as create more video/ performance art works. I did some filming for a project I am making for myself to get to grips with the editing software, filming, mastering and creating sound and audio for, all things filmy.
I believe that I have finished the recording and filming aspect which is good, it's now all on the editing side, which I am super excited to get to the audio for.
It has been a real joy to reconnect with friends I haven't seen in a very very long time, It is incredibly refreshing to see how everyone has flourished despite the difficult situations we have gone through and wish those who are moving away the best of luck on their future endeavors, and those around me to continue moving forwards in their paces, I'll catch up with you sooner or later, promise.
From talking with all of them it made me realize I wasn't alone in the thought of how contracting it can be living rural when it comes to personal growth.
I remember reading somewhere that we are creatures of habit, and adapt/ become a product of the environment I am in. I can see this, as the more I spend time around that sort of environment, the idea of focusing on myself more than what I can do in my lifetime, not to just accept the world for that it is.
Spongleheims' 'ONE' Submissions
I have also submitted some works into Spongheims online gallery 'One', showcasing art-brut/outsider art, mainly focusing on self taught artists. I submitted 3 works, one of which you have all seen before, and two more, one created for the other group which focus more on the edgy side, and one I made that afternoon, as I had a canvas spare and improvised with it.
The first one which I have showcased before: One Moment with The Devil, Morgan, and The Eavesdropper.
I tried to find a reason to connect these 3 portraits together. The ideas I had from them was the narrative of a deal with the devil, of a mundane deal, on a bus in London.
What the deal is we don't know, but neither look particularly intrigued in this deal, implying that life contains more cruel and evil deals which we are subjected too, such as the banking system, interest rates and the daily grind to profit for the rich and for the poor to eat. All 3 portraits in this work are a subject to these daily evils through the eavesdropper to not intervene when evil is taking place.
The next one, I still do not know weather these are connected or occurrence, but the idea of creating the vision of the devil as this powerless mundane creature compared to the world we are in now is somewhat appealing to me. This piece is called Last Stop.
I like to play with the idea of subverting the Christian ideal of devils being an all powerful, cunning and crafty entity of cruelty and hate by connecting them nothing more than the same life that we all as human beings live. From the old books the majority of us have gone against the ancient rules, does that make us any higher than a devil? I'd say not, and that the real evils are in suits and private jets, not with horns and pitchforks. The use of height is something I focused on especially for I enjoyed the use of having a unconventionally long pitchfork as a symbol of insignificance, partnered with a mildly disgruntled expression it creates a more inconvenienced character than a creature born of pure hatred of whatever the fuck they see the devil is. This devil itself is stood waiting for a bus, or for someone.
I played with the idea of texture in this piece, using difference strokes against the grain of the other strokes to create landscape, such as the bench and houses behind the character. I also attempted to use collage work for the sign but didn't look as good as intended but alas, its a process isn't it?
There is also glitter within the paint, shouldn't of done that really but it adds a little more heat/ ember rain feel to it.
The last piece is a little more morbid, which isn't particularly my cup of tea when it comes to curating. Personally I prefer to leave more questions when it comes to work but this one felt more like self expression as opposed to usual idea of leaving the work open to interpretation.
Blatantly titled ''Sunday Night at 9:27, I Had a Breakdown", the title says everything you particularly need to know about this work.
This was based off a distinct memory I had last year when working in a factory job I hated. During this time I was struggling to find a significance in my existence in the broad terms of things, and fearful that life was approaching to become nothing more than what is set for me in this direct moment, living, working, withering and dying in the valley I was born in, providing nothing apart from passively polluting the planet and wasting the precious unreclaimable commodity of time within our lifespan.
I distinctly remember the time, remembering this was the hour before I had to sleep, feeling that time I had to myself was rare, let alone if I could actually decompress the stress of working and where I am living currently. This is the best way I can reproduce the feeling in that moment. The focus I wanted was bleakness, and minimality when it came to composition of the canvas. I tried to recreate the feeling of insignificance, and the creeping black mold of stresses, fears, the future creeping and closing in, the unstoppable constricting feeling of ill-fate surrounding and closing in, and the feeling of powerlessness to combat it.
The use of ink and charcoal was a decision to create a contrast of sharpness when it came to the difference between the object of a person laying curled up, facing away, compared to the swirling smudged charcoal to create the contrast between physical and metaphysical.
Of course, the issue of this work is the ambiguity when it comes to the center object, which I feel can be very difficult to visually translate without description or title. This is something I need to work on as I find it difficult to create human anatomy and figures to actually look as intended.
As I said before, I've been wanting to get back into Dungeons and Dragons, and picking up the online campaign which I was running before I got overwhelmed with work and such. Where they left off was they faced before a labyrinth, set within the undercity of the grand city above, searching after a elusive elf woman, commuting atrocities and attacks within the city. They concluded knowing they will need to find a guide for these tunnels, who they go to is their choice, as there are few, know know how to traverse the maze of tunnels and dungeons, but few willing to help out of the goodness of their heart.
Either way, I have started to create a written dialect, out of curiosity to see how I can develop it, whilst also aiding to a puzzle for the party. I will showcase a little for my name at the end. Overall, from a creative perspective, I find it intriguing to see how we develop language and how translate symbols into language. For example, you reading this sentence, a collection of shapes and spaces translates into information, and does this by letters and structure of the information set out in a easily digestible way, which is something I intend to do with this language.
In time, I hope to show you it completed, I am currently working on finishing, letters and its capital counterparts, soon, numbers, other punctuation, and phonics are in the works.
SOTW- That Jazz - Coops
Slick and smooth drum loop, with sampled jazz layered with a good flow of lines. Bosh.
Black Widow - 5/10
This is going to be a reviewed with slight bias, as I am not particular huge on superhero films. Black Widow did some things I think were actually kind of great, some of the combat sequences and interaction between characters is actual quite effective. However, there was a lot in which I felt was either out of place, or continuity errors such as a superhero that can punch open a thick steel door but not glass. Or a shattered windshield magically repairing mid action sequence when it feels like it.
The reason for the 5 is that it is a perfectly average film, it follows the classic cookie cutter Marvel format, but personally I feel it as a film overall was quite forgettable. Props however to the performances of most actors in the film. 5/10
Good Times- 7/10
Following after a bank heist gone wrong, one brother tries to get enough money to bust out his specials needs brother from jail in a night of chaos, crazy characters, vile displays of manipulation and constant energy and tension in every scene.
I think what this film plays with is the threshold of believability, as chaotic as the film is, it doesn't stray far from news articles we have read or watched before. All the characters are iconic in their own way and are fleshed out to be incredibly believable, flawed characters.
I really enjoyed this film actually, I felt the idea of this film taking place more or less all through one night and seeing how each character has a ending and concludes the plot beautifully. 7/10.
The Mule 5/10
Clint Eastwood isn't a cowboy. He is a old man who is politically incorrect but means good, getting into the crime scene and ends up in over his head.
I think all in all this films isn't a bad film, but strictly not as enjoyable as the similar film 'Gran Torino' in my opinion. Same deal I had with Black Widow, I feel there are some really great moments in this film, but the clichés of the plotlines gave me this feeling of disappointment of knowing where the plot will go. Eastwood did his usually great performance with kind-hearted gentleness and craftiness.
The Island 7/10
Sci-Fi questioning the morality of human immortalism and testing/ human organ farming. Through this film we see humans living in a large complex waiting to leave for 'The Island' the only place not ravaged by apocalyptic turmoil, to repopulate the world. That is until one curious person finds out the true nature of what happens when they leave to 'The Island'
I really enjoyed the concept actually, I find it a interesting film to ask questions whilst also face value just a fun films to watch. 7/10
That is everything for this update, thanks for giving it a read and i'll see you all in the big 20, appreciate it.